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英文小诗精选:Dream of the Evil Servant

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by Reetika Vazirani

New Delhi, 1967

1.We kept war in the kitchen.

A set of ten bone china plates, now eight.

As if a perfumed guest stole her riches . . .The next day she wanted to leave at noon.

I said, be back by four, Im paying you.She sat by the door,she put out her hand,her knuckles knocked against mine,hard deliberate knuckles. I gave her cash.

Off to watch movies, off to smoke ganja.

2.She came back late and high as if my fear asked for it.

I called her junglee.Everything went off late ——dinner, the children getting into bed;but the guests understood:they had servants too.She stuck diaper pins in my children.

I cursed her openly.Who shouted?Or I cursed her silently and went my way.

She stole bangles my husbands mother bought,bangles a hundred years old.

But she wore frayed jewelryhawked on the street.She was like a rock that nickedfurniture in corners youd think only a rat could go.

3.Why didnt I dismiss her?

I dont know.

She got old as I got old.

I could see her sharp shoulder bones

tighten, her knuckled skull.

I had to look at her.

It had to wound me.

Listen, said my mother. Yes mother, I listened, crouched in my head.

Looking over the flowered verandah she said:

Who are you to think you are beautiful?What have you got to show?Go sit on your rag.

All my life I tended to looks,they betrayed me. I bore you.I am wretched.Be my mother.Be my maid.